Greetings Laff Lovers,
Welcome back to hell, I mean work. Over the weekend my dental
school nephew asked me if I enjoyed my work. I made some quick
snide comment about how I’d rather be a stay-at-home dad, put
on an apron, be the bitch and not ever work again.
He said, “No. I mean really.”
I sat up, straightened my spine and seriously considered his
question. It was then, on Labor Day, that I truly realised
how much I hate working.
“Yes, son of my brother, it is true. I fucking hate working.
I’ve been working too long. I really would like to stay home,
cook, clean and wipe the kids’ asses. Do yourself a favor:
play the lottery, marry a wealthy woman, or become a treasure
hunter. Do whatever it is that you have to do to never work a
day more than necessary. It’s too late for me–I’ve chosen a
difficult path. But for you, you spoon fed, lazy, piece of
shit, there is still a chance to never accomplish anything.
Now go and succeed at doing nothing.”
Laboriously,
TZ
“My uncle’s dying wish was that he wanted me on his lap–He
was in the electric chair.” –Rodney Dangerfield
CLEARANCE ITEM: Mix & Go
The Powerful, Portable Mixer With A Spill Proof Cup…
Retail Price: $14.99
DEAL PRICE: $5.99
The Spill Proof Cup Comes With It’s Own Mixer!
The amazing Mix & Go has an innovative snap-tight lid design
that makes it perfect for outdoor activities. Great for mixing
health drinks, pancake batter, beats eggs fast and much much more.
What everyone loves about the Mix & Go is it comes with its own
mini electric whisk so you can prepare individual servings of
food and drink, anywhere and anytime.
Out and about… it is ideal for mixing up baby formula,
powdered slimming drinks and milkshakes. At home… it is a
convenient no mess way to whisk small portions of fresh
mayonnaise or custard, froth up coffee mix, health drinks, beat
eggs, even make pancake batter.
The slim line 14 oz. mug fits in car drinks holders.
Grab one, two, three or more… this makes a GREAT gift for
just about anyone. It’s something that will be used over
and over and over. Visit:
http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/498/l/2n46s3
<a href=”http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/498/l/2n46s3“>
Powerful, Portable Mixer & Spill Proof Cup…</a>
A pair of strip club patrons are ogling the cuties who are
leaving the dressing room. “Do you see that redhead over
there? I feel like screwing her again.”
“Wow,” said his buddy, “Do you mean to tell me you’ve been
doing it with that great looking broad?”
“No, but I felt like it before, and I feel like it now.”
One Greek living in America says to another, “Do you think
you’ll ever go back to Greece?”
“No,” he answered, “I’ll stick with K-Y Jelly.”
WATER GEL PEARLS
Just Add Water And Watch Them Grow…
Retail Price: $7.99
DEAL PRICE: $3.99…
or get two or more packs (mix n match colors) for $2.99 each
These polymer pearls are created by simply adding water and
can hold 100 times their weight in water! This causes the water
absorbent beads to expand into perfect miniature spheres.
Use them to add some extra color to your decorating scheme,
centerpiece, candlescape, etc. Use separately or mix colors
in one vase for a stellar effect! As little as 2 ounces will
create approximately 5.75L or 1.5 gallons of hydrated water
pearls! Water pearls are reusable and will fit down the smallest
vase openings (i.e. tower vases) Non-toxic and biodegradable.
To get more info on these, or to order, visit:
http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/498/l/vq6675
<a href=”http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/498/l/vq6675“>
WATER GEL PEARLS – Just Add Water And Watch Them Grow…</a>
Having lunch one day, a sex therapist said to her friend,
“According to a survey we just completed, ninety percent of
all people masturbate in the shower. The other ten percent
of them sing.”
“Really?” asked the friend.
The therapist shook her head and proceeded to ask, “And do
you know what the most popular song people sing in the
shower?”
The friend shook her head and replied, “No.”
The therapist replied, “I didn’t think so.”
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*** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***
It’s Available. The Laffaday Book… Check it out, it’s
F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
<a href=” http://www.gophercentral.com/book/laff.html “>
Laffaday Book</a>
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END OF LAFF A DAY
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved.
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