Greetings Laff Lovers,
I went for my one-week eye check-up this morning. 20/20.
That’s practically miraculous considering I couldn’t see
anything closer than three feet in front of my face without
glasses or contact lenses just one week ago.
My joy today is a little blunted by the fact that I cannot
breathe or swallow without pain. This cold is just getting
worse. So I am going home early, taking some drugs and
wrapping myself up in blankets.
I’m not even going to ask my wife for a hummer. That’ll
give you an idea of how shitty I feel right now.
Sightedly,
TZ
“Ashley Dupree, Eliot Spitzer’s hooker, says she’s sorry
for the pain she caused Eliot Spitzer’s wife, and that
she feels connected to her. Maybe if she wasn’t connected
to her husband, none of this would have happened.”
-Jay Leno
SET OF 20 SUPER HOOKS
Simply Clever… Just Push & Turn…
Normal Price: $14.99
DEAL PRICE: $5.99
Get 2 Sets (40 hooks total) for $9.98
Say goodbye to your hammer and nails. Now you can hang pictures,
mirrors, shelves or more FAST, EASY, and more SECURELY than
every before.
With these clever Super Hooks, all you do is just position,
twist, turn and voila!! No drills, no hammers, no mess.
You get a set of 20.
Works on drywall, plaster or paneling. Perfect for home,
office, or school. Holds up to 100 lbs.
http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/498/l/5k03d7
<a href=”http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/498/l/5k03d7“>
SUPER HOOKS – Simply Clever… Just Push & Turn</a>
The four most important things for a plumber to learn:
1.Hot on the left, cold on the right.
2.Shit flows downhill.
3.Payday is Friday.
4.Don’t chew your fingernails.
“President Bush has exactly two months left in office. His
team is hard at work packing his Legos for the long move
back to Texas.” -Jimmy Kimmel
CelebSLIM (30 Day Supply)
Just One Pill A Day… To Be Celebrity Slim
Retail Price: $49.99
DEAL PRICE: $19.99
Let’s face it most diets fail. Is what you are currently doing,
working for you? Are you ready for your next big change?
Grab a bottle of CelebSLIM Extra Strength and within two weeks
you will notice a difference… we promise!
If after just two weeks you don’t:
1. Lose weight 2. Feel Better 3. AND Have Less Cravings
(not just one but if you don’t experience ALL THREE), then return
the unused portion for a full refund of the 30 day supply.
For years Celebrities have been paying almost $50 a bottle for
this secret formula that works!
What Does CelebSLIM do?:
- Suppresses Your Appetite…
- Curbs Your Cravings…
- Boosts Your Metabolism, without drugs…
Plus there is… No Caffeine! No Ephedra! No Jitters…
BEST OF ALL, Take only 1 pill a day to be CelebSLIM…
Grab a 30 day bottle… you have nothing to lose but weight…
Visit: http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/120/a/498/l/3s41e7
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Just One Pill A Day… To Be Celebrity Slim</a>
BEER vs PUSSY.
1. Beer is always wet while the pussy needs to be stimulated.
1 point for beer.
2. Hot beer is certainly not good. 1 point for pussy.
3. A cold beer offers you satisfaction. 1 point for beer.
4. If you find a hair between your teethes while drinking
beer, it could make you feel sick. 1 point for pussy.
5. If you return home and you smell like beer, your wife
will have a fight with you. If you return home and you smell
like pussy, your wife will dump you. 1 point for beer and 1
point for pussy (depending on your situation).
6. If you have a beer with the condom on, you don’t feel a
difference in taste. 1 point for beer.
7. If you keep asking yourself how will the next pussy be,
it’s natural. If you ask yourself how will the next beer be,
you’re an alcoholic. 1 point for pussy.
8. The government has a tax on beer. 1 point for pussy.
9. You are always certain to be the first opening the bottle
of beer. 1 point for beer.
10. Beer doesn’t have a mother you have to meet. 1 point for
beer.
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*** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***
It’s Available. The Laffaday Book… Check it out, it’s
F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
<a href=” http://www.gophercentral.com/book/laff.html “>
Laffaday Book</a>
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END OF LAFF A DAY
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved.
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