Greetings Laff Lovers,
Did you hear that Dave Letterman apologized to Sarah Palin’s
teenage daughter and her family after making the joke about
the daughter getting knocked up at a baseball game?
You have to be careful when making jokes about having sex with
teenage girls. I can get away with it because the only people
subscribed to this list are degenerates and alcoholics, but
Letterman has a mainstream audience in the millions. Plus, I
never makes jokes about specific people’s teenage daughters.
Just teenage girls in general.
Well, that’s not completely true. Years ago we had a neighbor
with a teenage daughter who loved to sunbathe in her bikini
in the backyard. My house has a great view of that backyard
from the attic ventilation window.
But even then nobody knew exactly who I was talking about
(at least I never got sued). Letterman had to go and pick the
daughter of the Governor of Alaska and recent vice-presidential
hopeful.
To be completely fair and impartial, her daughter is pretty
cute.
Honestly,
TZ
“My ultimate fantasy is to entice a man to my bedroom, put a
gun to his head and say, ‘Make babies or die’.” -Ruby Wax
Handy Trends Upside Down Tomato Planter
World’s Easiest Way To Grow Vegetables…
Normal Price: $19.99
DEAL PRICE: $12.99
Get two for $19.98
I have wanted this item for almost two months. And judging
by the email I’ve gotten from many of you… you have been
waiting too.
Well wait no more… The Upside Down Tomato Planter is here.
One thing I did not know is that you can use this for other
vegetables besides Tomatoes.
The Handy Trends Upside Down Tomato Planter is an ingenious
tomato/vegetable planter turns gardening upside down!. Grow
delicious, juicy tomatoes all season long simply by hanging it
on a deck, balcony or patio.
Simply plant a seedling plant in the wire basket, hang, water,
and watch it grow… yep it is that easy.
This efficient growing system yields up to 30 lbs of tomatoes
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love how easy it is to have a garden on your patio.
To get more info or order, visit:
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Handy Trends Upside Down Tomato Planter
A gay guy walked into a delicatessen and asked the shopkeeper
for a 12 inch summer sausage. “Would you like it sliced, sir?”
the shopkeeper asked politely.
“What do you think I am?” replied the fag, “a slot machine!?”
“Back in school my classmates would copulate with anything
that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself.”
-Emo Philips
…….. “Oh, My Aching Back” ……..
THE BACK STRETCHER by North American Healthcare
Great For Aching Muscles Stress & More…
List Price: $59.99
DEAL PRICE: $24.99
Get Two for $39.98
“OH MY ACHING BACK”… If you’ve ever uttered these words,
take note of this amazing Back Stretcher that uses natural
traction to reverse the effects of spinal compression and
pinched nerves, by simply relaxing or stretching your achy back.
Stretch your back and increase flexibility using this gently
curved arch to help naturally relieve pain caused by excessive
bending, muscle spasms and spinal compression.
Simply lie on the arch on a firm surface for a few minutes per
day. Comfortable foam padding on sturdy wood frame with channel
area to take pressure off the spine. If you have serious back
pain, consult your physician before use. 16″ x 10 ¼”.
Grab one for $24.99 or get two (one for home & one for the
office) for $39.96. VISIT:
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THE BACK STRETCHER by North American Healthcare
A man and his wife were celebrating their 40th wedding
anniversary. The wife says to her husband, “We’ve been
married so long, sweetheart, I hope you feel you can ask
me anything you want. After all this time I want us to be
completely open in our relationship.”
The husband replies, “Okay, there is one thing that has
been bothering me for a long time, but I haven’t had the
courage to ask before…but I have noticed that all six
of our children look similar to one another except one. I
can’t figure out how he got to look so different. Did he
have a different father than the rest?”
The wife stops. She is unable to look her husband in the
eyes. Slowly she replies, “yes. Yes he did have a different
father.”
Her husband was taken aback. “Oh! Okay, I must know. Please
tell me. Who was that child’s father?”
Again she cannot look her husband in the eyes. She is very
distressed, and after a long silence she slowly said, “YOU”
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*** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***
It’s Available. The Laffaday Book… Check it out, it’s
F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
Laffaday Book
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END OF LAFF A DAY
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