Greetings Laff Lovers,
“I don’t understand the conflict in the scientific and
religious communities regarding Creationism vs. Evolution,”
I said to a group of visiting clients over lunch. “I mean,
whether God created us via intelligent design or monkey’s
fucking–we are still His creation.”
“Um, yes, I guess,” said one suit. “I think the contra-
diction comes in through the story of Adam and Eve…”
“No problem,” I interrupted. “If you are an evolutionist,
then the story of Adam and Eve becomes a parable, which,
by the way, is a popular method God employs when trying
to teach us something. And if you are a creationist then
you can take it literally. Either way, the only way to
find out for certain is to die, so I’m in no hurry to know.”
“Who is this moro…guy?” one of the dickheads asked
Magilla.
“He’s buying,” Magilla replied.
“Oh, I see, um, thank you. Interesting ideas…”
Simply,
TZ
Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in
your family at this link: mailto:tz@gophercentral.com
***
MEMORY FOAM INSOLES
It’s like walking on air…
Retail Price: $9.99
DEAL PRICE: $4.99
You’ll feel like walking on air with these specially designed
insoles. These Memory Foam Insole have a top layer made of
pressure-relieving, memory foam that conforms perfectly to
your foot’s shape for the most comfortable fit and support
possible. Easy-to-use… simply cut for a perfect fit… anyone
can use them… that is up to a size 11 Men’s foot.
Benefits:
- Molds to your feet for unbelievable comfort
- Excellent for people with foot conditions seeking added comfort
- Molds to your foot
- Relives pressure on the ball of your foot, bunions and joints
- Prevents heel shock by cushioning your every step
- Supports your arch
- Increases stability by cradling your foot & preventing foot roll
- Gives you custom comfort from your heel to your toes
- Provides much needed rest for your tired, achy feet
http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/4006/c/120/a/498
***
“Iran fired a rocket into space carrying a mouse, a turtle,
and some worms. It reminds me of the time when I was eight
years old and my friend and I glued a cockroach to a bottle
rocket and shot it over his fence.” -Jimmy Kimmel
***
When I checked into my motel, I asked the lady at the desk:
“I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled.”
“No,” she said, “it’s regular porn, you sick bastard.”
[Thanks to twisted Laffaday reader Charles Starks.]
***
“Yesterday was Groundhog Day. In fact, when the groundhog
came out of his hole, he didn’t even look for his shadow, he
just said he was walking away from his mortgage.” -Jay Leno
———————————————————————————–
BRAWNY PRODUCE PROTECTOR BAGS
Package of 20…
Normal Price: $9.99
DEAL PRICE: $5.99
Get Two Packages (40 Bags) for $9.98
Tired of throwing out rotten food? Brawny Produce Protector
Bags prolong the life of your fruits, vegetables and cut flowers
without the use of chemicals. Stock up on produce without
worrying about rapid spoilage or extend the life of your home-
grown fruits & veggies.
HOW PRODUCE PROTECTOR BAGS WORK:
Fruits, vegetables and flowers release ethylene gas while
ripening after harvesting or picking. Ethylene gas accelerates
ripening, aging and rotting. Forever Bags absorb and remove this
damaging gas, dramatically extending the life of fruits,
vegetables and flowers.
FEATURES:
- You get 20 Brawny Produce Protector Bags (10 – 9″ x 15″, 10 – 12″ x 17″)
- Save Money… Waste Less Produce
- Reusable up to 20 Times
- Keep Produce Fresh Approx. 30 Day
- Reduce Vitamin Loss by 50%
It does all that with NO CHEMICALS! Get one package of 20 Brawny
Produce Protector Bags for $5.99 or pick up two packages (40 Bags)
for $9.98. Yep… you’re getting two for the normal price of one.
VISIT: http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/14363/c/120/a/498
———————————————————————————–
“Get this,” said one drinker to his friends at the bar, “Last
night while I was here with you guys, a burglar broke into my
house.
“Did he get anything?” his friends asked.
“yeah, a broken jaw, two teeth knocked out, and a pair of
broken nuts. The wife thought it was me coming home drunk.”
Email TZ at: mailto:tz@laffaday.com
P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the
new Laffaday forum here… http://laffaday.gophercentral.com
- – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - –
*** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***
It’s Available. The Laffaday Book… Check it out, it’s
F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/14420/c/120/a/498
- – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - –
END OF LAFF A DAY
Copyright 2010 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved.
.gif)
