Laff-A-Day

Greetings Laff Lovers,

I’ll tell you why I love my wife. She’s an attractive woman,
but there are women who are sexier. She’s educated, but
there are women who are smarter.

No, the reason I love my wife is the way she thinks.

We were driving the other day and she pointed out a
personalized license plate to me. It was a big pick-up
truck with a Harley Davidson bumper sticker and those
bullet hole decals on the back window. The license plate
read: DRT BAG.

The wife turned to me and asked, straight-faced, “Why would
anyone want the license plate Dr. T-Bag?”

That’s my wife,

TZ

“I understand there is now a new virginity movement in high
schools around the country where kids are now saving
themselves for the right teacher.” –Jay Leno

 

      —– Amos ‘N Andy Complete Collection —–
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Okay folks, if you are a lover of the classic Amos ‘N Andy
television series, this is for YOU. Not only are all 71
episodes contained in this brilliant collection, but also
all of the radio shows, as well as the feature “Check and
Double Check”.

Amos ‘N Andy will never be run on television again due to
political correctness, but this is a piece of television
history and probably one of the funniest shows ever aired.
This collection was lovingly restored by archivists and now
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shows included. Making this waaaaaay Less than $1 per episode.
Order your DVD collection today, you will treasure it forever.
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Two elderly Irish drinking buddies are sitting at the pub
pondering on the future.

One says to the other, “You know Mr. O’Shea, we’ve had great
sport together for many years. It just came to mind that
should it be I who should happen to go first, it would mean
a great deal to me if you would say a few kind words at me
grave.”

The other friend responds, “That I’ll do, Mr.O’Donnel, that
I’ll do. But should it be I who should happen to go first,
for old times sake I’d be forever grateful if you would pour
a bottle of fine Irish whiskey over me grave.”

The friend responds, “That I’ll do. That I’ll do. But would
you mind it so much if it should happen to pass through me
kidneys first?”

 

Two homos, named Cecil and Scott, were living together.
It was stinking hot one day and Cecil arrived home to find
Scott with his ass in the freezer.

“Scott! What the hell are you doing?”

Scott replied, “It was so hot outside, I thought you’d like
something cool to slip into…”

 

MAGNETIC JEWELRY CLASP SET

Normal Price: $9.99
DEAL PRICE: $4.99
Get Two (2) For: $7.98

Magnetic Clasps are the ingenious magnetic jewelry clasps
that make securing your necklaces, bracelets or anklets
a snap!

Just bring the ends near, and they click together every time.
You don’t even have to see what you’re doing. Magnetic Clasp
attaches easily to any jewelry. Just bring the ends of them
near each other and they instantly click shut and safely lock,
creating a super-magnetic bond, which is doubly, secured by
a twist lock.

Includes:
4 Magnetic Clasps w/ built-in safety locks. (2 Gold & 2 Silver)

PLUS a Bonus:
- 2 extenders (1 silver tone, 1 gold tone) that let you
  add a little extra length to your necklace with these
  3 inch extenders.

Grab one or two of these by visiting:
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The banker saw his old friend Tom, an eighty year-old rancher
in town. Tom had lost his wife a year or so before and rumor
had it that he was marrying a “mail order” bride. Being a
good friend, the banker asked Tom if the rumor was true. Tom
assured him that it was. The banker then asked Tom the age of
his new bride to be.. Tom proudly said, “She’ll be twenty-one
in November.”

Now the banker, being the wise man that he was, could see that
the sexual appetite of a young woman could not be satisfied by
an eighty-year-old man. Wanting his old friend’s remaining
years to be happy the banker tactfully suggested that Tom
should consider getting a hired hand to help him out on the
ranch, knowing nature would take its own course. Tom thought
this was a good idea and said he would look for one that
afternoon.

About four months later, the banker ran into Tom in town
again. “How’s the new wife?” asked the banker.

Tom proudly said, “Oh, she’s pregnant.”

The banker, happy that his sage advice had worked out,
continued, “And how’s the hired hand?”

Without hesitating, Tom said, “She’s pregnant, too.”

 

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           *** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***

  It’s Available. The Laffaday Book… Check it out, it’s
  F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
  <a href=” http://www.gophercentral.com/book/laff.html “>
  Laffaday Book</a>

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END OF LAFF A DAY
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved.</pre>